Karma's Traumatic Birth! Long with pics & vid :)

Sorry its late ladies! Taken a while for me to get my head around everything!

Some of you might know my original birthplan, some of you might not. For those who don't, this is how it *should* have gone.

My plan was for Karma to be born at home, have a very active labour, no
pain relief, be able to use gravity positions for birth, natural
delivery of the placenta and for a lotus birth (placenta kept attatched
until it fell off of its own accord).

My actual labour and delivery as it was couldn't have been further from that!

I went into labour naturally without the need for a sweep/induction. I guess I got one thing I wanted!


Guess I better get started ...

2AM

4 Days overdue on Monday 4th of January at 2am I awoke with a strong
contraction. At first I mistook it for a braxton hicks contraction but
5 minutes later - I had another. Again I thought "false alarm" but sure
enough, 5 minutes after that! Another! I woke up Matt (who was supposed
to be going back to work that day after a months holiday if she hadn't
arrived by now!) and I told him I thought this was it! After a few more
contractions we deffinatly decided something was happening!

I nipped to the toilet to see if there was any plug/waters leaking but instead I was greeted with bright red blood
I called the hospital and spoke to a lovely lady on the phone and after
explaining my homebirth situation she advised me to put on a pad and
see what happened over the next half an hour and then to call her back
to let her know what was going on.

I did this and checked half an hour later, there was a little spotting
but nothing major execpt for when I wiped. I called her back up and
told her this and she asked that I come in to get checked over as it
didn't seem normal being as the loss wasn't mucusy She also told me not to worry though as these things can happen and if everything is okay I would probably be allowed home!

3.30AM

So! Being as we hadn't even bothered to pack for the hospital (I was
sure we'd be fine!) We quickly grabbed stuff for us and baby shoved it
all in a hold-all and walked into town to catch a cab to hospital. 10
minutes later we arrived and were sent into an examination room to wait
for a doctor and midwife.

After about an hour a midwife came in and hooked me upto tocco and said
they'll monitor me for an hour. Baby's heartrate was doing fine and my
contractions were reaching around 80-90% .

4AM

After the monitoring a doctor came in to do an internal examination to
see if they could find out where the bleeding was coming from! After
that was done and dusted they said it was inconclusive and more than
likely just blood coming away as the cervix was opening. She also told
me I was 3cm dialated!

The doctor spoke with me about my wishes for a homebirth and told me
that she would have to speak with the consultant to see what they
thought about be going home and if it would be okay.
She returned around half a hour later and told me that the consultant
thought it would be better if I stayed in and that I would be under
constant consultant lead care

Those were the words I dreaded
I had to hold myself from bursting into tears when she said that. It
was horrible! Obviously I agreed as being as this is my first baby I
didn't really want to put her into any harm and if the consultant
wanted me in there care then I thought it must be serious?

I was also told that I would be constantly monitored for progress - In
other words bedridden and strapped to tocco for the duration of my
labour. GREAT.

I wasn't even allowed to deliver in the labour suit

5AM

After the doctor had spoken to me a midwife came and led us to the
consultant labour room (it was horrible and clinical, I just couldn't
relax
) and hooked me back onto tocco. I tried my best to keep as active as
possible - I had a big bouncy birthball which I used to take my mind
off the pain before I tried gas&air (I didn't think I needed it as
the pain wasn't unbearable)

After a couple of hours I hadn't really progressed immensly so I was
offered the option of having my waters broken which I accepted.

It was a weird sensation! Like a pop then a gush and it was all warm and strange

About an hour after that I felt my contractions had deffinatly got stronger, longer and more intense!

I tried out the gas&air when the pain got a bit more intense - my
god that stuff is good! I was spinning my head off! Matt tried a bit
too and loved it

8AM

I was texing my mum and she told me she would be on her way and be with me soon! Within about an hour she was here!

Pain was getting pretty bad by this
point but I was still coping and breathing and bouncing on my ball so I
was dealing with it.

9.30AM

Around
this time midwives were flitting in and out seeing how I was etc etc...
I was still having bloodloss but it was now becoming mucusy so I don't
think it was that bad.

Anyway!
They decided it would be a good idea to put me on a hormone drip to
speed things up! The consultant came in with a band of other doctory
looking people and told me thats what she thought was best being as I
was progressing slowly. I agreed - albeit reluctantly.

Within an hour I was hooked up to the drip AND tocco meaning I was most certainly
BEDRIDDEN. Being as tocco was on one side and drip was on the other, so
I was trapped in the middle.

Within about 2 hours the pain started getting unbearable and as I'd been told
baby had twisted so that we were back to back I WAS IN AGONY. I
couldn't stand or even go on the ball cause I was strapped to the
fucking monitor and drip. Looking back it was just a big gas&air
filled haze! My mum and Matt were massaging my back where it hurt when
I got a contraction and it really worked to an extent. I don't know
what I would have done without them!

12PM

By now I was in hell. I cried through every contraction it was so bad.
My back was arching with the pain and I was still forced to stay in bed
on the monitor even though baby had been fine all the way through! Whoever tells you its not as bad as it sounds is LYING!

1.30PM

After enduring hours of intense pain I finally gave in I asked for an epidural.


ONLY TO BE TURNED DOWN BECAUSE I WAS 10 FUCKING CENTIMETERS DIALATED!!!!

I was very angry about this as I was VERY VERY tired (try 1 hours sleep
before the contractions woke me up and I hadn't slept during labour at
all!) and hadn't been checked interanally since my waters were broken!
So god only knows how long I'd been fully dialted! I could have been
pushing her out hours ago!

Almost imediatly she got me to start pushing. I tried and tried and
TRIED. An hour went by and still no baby. I was practically passing out
from the pain. They gave me a cathater to see if emptying my bladder
would work but no such luck. I was so weak from tiredness and my body
had literally no energy as It'd just been left to deal with the pain on
my own. No matter how hard I pushed I just couldn't keep it going long
enough for me to progress
I was so tired and out of breath and in pain I just couldn't do it. The
only pain relief I had was to moan and groan! I was like a wild animal!
But hey, don't knock it! If you have nothing else - it works!

3.30PM

After 2 hours and no progress and babys heartrate dropped below 50 the
doctor was called to preform a forceps delivery as she was in distress
and I just couldn't handle it anymore.

I was put in stirrups and given a general anastetic down below whilst I
was given an episiotomy and the forceps were inserted. By now the pain
had got worse than I ever thought possible! I thought I was going to
die! Then I got extreme cramp in my leg ! It was all getting unbearable!

I was told she would be out in 2 pushes max! So on my next contraction
I went for it. I screamed so loud I'm surprised the windows didn't
crack! It was the most blood curdling scream I have ever heard!!! And
it came from my mouth! After that one push she was out! I cried with
relief! She started crying immidietly and was put on my chest!

So on the 4th of January 2010 at 4.01PM Karma was born weighing in at 7lbs and 14oz



Unfortunatly my notes and birthplan weren't read and her cord was cut and placenta disposed of before I even noticed as I was in shock.

Jesus christ. Just thinking about it has got my heart racing! I remember thinking afterwards how intense it all was. My god.

And it doesn't end there!

After she was born I was getting stitched up - I can't believe how much that hurt either! Ouch ouch ouch!

I felt absolutly shite. To put it bluntly! Apparently I'd lost a liter of bood
no wonder I felt like a ghost!! I couldn't move for hours I was so
stiff all over :'( I couldn't even hold my baby I was so weak.

A video few mins after birth with daddy



After a few hours I requested a shower as I just felt sooo gross and it
literally took me about an hour to get out of bed! I stumbled into the
shower and just stood there for what seemed like an eternity and just
stared at the blood running down the plughole.

When I'd finished the bathroom was a bloodbath
there was blood everywhere! Smeared all over the toilet, sink and
floor! At the time I thought I was going to faint - it was like being
in a horror movie! I was so so weak and shakey its a miracle I didn't
pass out. after I'd showered I got back into bed... A few hours later
at about 11pm I was sent up to the ward (Matt had to go home and so did
mum so I was alone ) I managed to get a few hours sleep but I was in alot of pain.

6 hours old!



We left the next morning and finally I was home with my family!


-----------------------------------------------------------
The last 3 weeks have been a nightmare as regards to recovery

On day 2 (although I was adamant they hadn't!) My stitches had come
open and my wound was gaping. After 4 days of agony I finally went to
a&e and they confirmed that it was open and that they couldn't
restitch in case it was infected
the week after that was hell. I couldn't do anything without being in
intense pain I felt so helpless! I cried my eyes out for a week it was
that bad!

Now 3 weeks on things are getting better! I can do stuff on my own and
the pain isn't that bad. I haven't been infected yet - touchwood! - so
I'm healing well

I'm still immensly dissappointed with my labour and very upset that my notes were disregarded.

But at the end of the day I have a healthy baby girl and I'm still alive!

And I guess thats all that matters!

8 Weeks Old!





Thanks for reading